Thursday, April 5, 2012

Meet the Meat: Glee Project 2, Part 1

Alright, let's cut into some of this beef:

Nellie, 19
Tacoma, WA
Nellie has been performing for eight years and is a vocalist for a local swing band – the youngest member by 20 years. Aside from singing, she also plays piano and guitar, and she writes her own original songs. She works as a barista and her favorite performance space is in a small, cozy coffee shop. Nellie has a strong love for the arts, especially photography, and can often be seen at photo shoots on her weekends off. Nellie was discovered for “The Glee Project” through an online video submission.

So...Ellis part two?  Actually, I can't say that too fast, as there is already a much more striking Ellis double in the cast (you know who you are).  I'm predicting she's going to be the McKynleigh of this cycle; technically very good, but can't connect to save her life.

Anyways, I'm sorry y'all, but this girl looks like she belongs in a Gap ad...from 1993.  The most interesting thing I can tell you about her is that she is apparently a barista, which makes me think she works at Starbucks.  Girl?  Work that angle if you want me to like you.  And let the free lattes flow.

Is it just me or does she look kind of nauseated?

She's EXACTLY like Ellis, isn't she.  I like her attitude, though--very 'over it'.  She says she tends toward big band, but this whole notion of changing up songs is precisely what Glee loves.  Get at it, barista babe.

Tyler, 21
Boca Raton, FL

Tyler has an ear for music. He has been performing for 11 years, and is passionate about picking up and learning to play different instruments like the ukulele, for one. Tyler is very independent in his lifestyle and ambitions. When he was 18 months old he taught himself how to read by sleeping with maps and the TV guide in his crib. Currently he is a student at Vanderbilt University. Tyler is half black, half white, Jewish and transgender. He uses Lady Gaga as a constant inspiration in his music. Tyler originally auditioned for “The Glee Project” at the Nashville open casting call.

So Tyler here is apparently a friend of a friend of mine from high school, which means I have to try to be nicer to him...sort of.  He's written as being transgender, and I am very curious as to what that means.  Obviously he's defining himself as a male, but...oh God, there is no way of addressing this without being insanely politically incorrect, but he looks like Justin Bieber.

Bet you weren't expecting that.  He also looks kind of depressed for being chosen as one of the final 14 for a hugely popular reality show which could very well earn him a role on Glee.  What's up, Black/White/Jewish Bieber?  Lights too bright?

Awww, he's the sweetest!  And who else is totally stoked to hear him sing, if he can make Sara Bareilles do a double take?

Charlie, 22
Chicago, IL

Charlie is an actor and a singer. He has been performing for 15 years and earned his BFA in acting from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. He once performed in an alley in Vienna, Austria, which was part of his senior year choir tour through Europe. Charlie is a person with severe ADHD and low-spectral autism. Although life has often been a social struggle for him, he feels that he would not be where he is today without the support of his “team of superheroes” – the friends and family that constantly provide love and encouragement. Charlie originally auditioned for “The Glee Project” at the New York City open casting call.


God, these people all look so boring, don't they?  I literally just want to write about how much he looks like a lesbian dressed up as Finn for Halloween.  What the hell is up with Ulrich?  Can he NOT see the massive similarities in the looks of these kids and already existing characters on the show?  Damian and Kurt look like twins, for Christsake.

Anyways, Charlie apparently has ADHD and low level autism, which...I'm sorry, but how does that make you interesting?  My cousin has autism, but I wouldn't say that's what distinguishes him as a person.  I have ADHD, but I'm also a fashion student, part time blogger, and kind of bitchy.  The rest of his bio reads like a resume, and UGH, BE INTERESTING.

I miss Lindsay and her constant proclamations of how everyone else sucked already.  THAT was good television.

UGH.  This guy could not be any less suited for reality television, so of course the producers are probably in love with him.  And Jesus, stop talking about getting back to Broadway before you even start filming the Glee Project.

The kissing on the dish washer line was pretty good though, I'll give him that.

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