Wednesday, July 13, 2011

A Diva Is A Female Version of...

Hey, does anyone want to tell me when The Glee Project...

Turned into one of the sluttier episodes of RuPaul's Drag Race?

I may have actually fallen in love with Matheus after this weeks episode. Sure, this week showed him being a massive dick to just about everyone, and then he decided to, you know, STRIP ONSTAGE, but I as far as I can tell, this behavior was basically encouraged by the mentors up until this point.

Plus, look at those abs: hot.


As far as the homework challenge goes...I mean, I don't get it.  He's almost always praised for these things.  I guess if the goal is to stand out, then he definitely does.  But not in a good way.  I'm surprised he didn't at least manage a few dollars in his G-String (oh, you know he totally has one) after this performance, although it's possible they fell out when he started inexplicably hopping around on one foot.  The latter I'll admit was actually pretty cool, visually speaking, and definitely a great way to stand out.

"[Alex] is obnoxiously cocky sometimes."

I have no real comment on this situation until I get to Alex, except I thought it was funny how everyone started calling everyone else arrogant in this episode.  Matheus calling someone else arrogant, however, is just hilarious.

Note to future reality show contestants: if you are calling someone arrogant, you're probably coming off as arrogant yourself.  Just sayin'.

 "The count you started was wrong--I'm not being a douche, I'm just saying."

CASE IN POINT.  Matheus, man, stop making this so easy.

"Matheus is turning into a DIV-O."

GIRL.  Effie White would have at least said 'please'. 

I like, can't even be funny about how ridiculously manipulated this scene was.  Eric's line about Matheus being a diva because he asked for water was freaking absurd, and obviously scripted.  He's doing a complex, energetic dance number in direct sunlight, dressed in a sweatshirt, ski cap, and long black sweatpants.  The fact that he even had to ask for water is despicable.  I'm pretty sure they were praying for one of these kids to pass out.

That still doesn't exactly excuse the way he interacted with the rest of the cast, particularly Zach and Damian.  Although, to, YET AGAIN be fair (I am being WAY too nice today) they probably figured out that the kid implodes after the slightest criticism.


And it doesn't excuse his horrendous performance in the video.  His vocals were gag-worthy, and his dance moves were sloppy and rigid looking.  Even if he hadn't been such a horse's ass during the shoot, he probably still would have been put in the bottom for just plain sucking.


I will say that this was pretty adorably tongue-in-cheek.


I figured Matheus would appreciate yet another photo of his abs.  I have to say, they are really impressive.  For my money, Matheus is probably the hottest guy on the show.  Don't worry, I'm still in love with Damian (and I think he's got a cuter face), but...I mean...look at those fucking abs!


Unless you're Zach.  Then you should probably hide your face in shame.


And if you're Alex, you should probably get a grip.  Girl, FELL OUT this week, didn't he?  And all because he purposefully sabotaged his chances of winning the dance of because he didn't want to lose trying his hardest.

Oops.  Did I say that out loud?

"I didn't want to win--let somebody else have the opportunity to shine."

We all had these moments growing up--hell, some of us still have them.  Alex unfortunately chose to have one on a national television program that averages half a million viewers per episode.  No biggie.


He was also too busy flaunting his superiority to actually, you know, PRACTICE HIMSELF.  The result?


Cliched, incongruous dance moves that showed very little imagination.  When Cameron is dancing better than you are, it's time to re-evaluate the conflicting importance of impressing your peers and impressing your superiors.


Also: WTF?  Why did you start shrieking like a maniac half way through?  There are easier ways to lose, and they don't involve screenshots as unflattering as this one, Aretha Jr.

"The choreography is extremely elaborate for most people, but I find it kinda easy."

Note to future reality show contestants: arrogance, no matter how justified, will always put you on the chopping block.

 "Alex is either a complete diva, or he's nothing."

The lack of effort he put into this video shoot was appalling.  Kid, you have the chance of your lifetime.  Not only that, but you should easily be able to discern that you are one of the clear front runners in this competition, and one of the few with a legitimate shot at winning.  AND YOU COULDN'T BE BOTHERED TO EVEN PUT AN EXPRESSION ON YOUR FACE.


Like the one you had when they told you that you were going to be singing "I Will Always Love You".  Why couldn't you have given THAT in the video?

Also, don't the rest of you guys just love how he reacted?  Sort of a combination of "SHOCKER" and "Oh, that old thing?".  Most American Idol contestants practically void themselves at the thought of singing this.


Then again, I can't think of many American Idol contestants that could pull this song off like THAT.  I replayed this over and over--it was AMAZING.  It was a little shaky and pitchy in the beginning, but hot damn if that song didn't just roll out of Junior after that.  I was stunned at his vocal control.  


Somewhere in Beverly Hills, Whitney is stumbling around a mansion, sobbing--occasionally throwing errant Grammy awards at the help--while tearing up pictures of this kid and snorting them.

2 comments:

  1. i definitely think Mattheus should go home both of his last chance performances like "Gives you Hell" and "Down" have made me want him to...Urgh he makes me angry

    and Alex being a diva is not helping anything, I think sometimes his voice is annoying and even though he can hit those notes, so can Mercedes and so can Rachel so BAM he's out in the few upcoming episodes.

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  2. i can see how McKynleigh was eliminated. The girl doesnt have presence at all.
    But, oh my god, that Matheus. Not again dude, you are a horrible performer, i dont understand what Ryan and the others see in him. I totally CANNOT. And after getting naked right there, he doesnt have shame.

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